When I was a (male) phil. major undergrad, I was dating the smartest and most sophisticated phil. major, by miles, in our leiter-top-10 dept. She convinced my (female) thesis advisor to work with me. But we had to keep our relationship a secret in the dept., lest she be perceived as simply my girlfriend. That sucked, but I get it, maybe more now (after years of grad school) than I did then.